Monday, December 17, 2012

I've been thinking about this,

Like many people, issues of mental heath and tragic violence have been on my mind. People have been talking about it on Facebook, and I have started to hope that we can finally have a serious and productive conversation about tragedy, and how we can best prevent one.

Recently, we've heard from a mother who sees echos of Adam Lanza in her own son as he grows. Wonkette wrote a compelling piece on the failure of the public discourse to engage with what she said in a meaningful or constructive manner. And then a doctor charged to heal those who are mentally ill spoke out, with a very clear and poginiant cry for help.

I am not Adam Lanza's father or his brother, or his teacher, or the tragic young man himself. But I can imagine him, and I can try to imagine what it might be like to be another young man facing mental illness.

I can only imagine how scary and frustrating it must be to alone in 

a mind that is not truly your own.

Especially in a society that is so uncomfortable with looking at you we only talk about extrem
es or after tragedy, when we can safely describe the person as other than ourselves, a monster.

I can only imagine what it would be like to know that I might harm someone around me, and know that there would be no one to help, or to stop me, until it was already too late.

I think that would be more terrifying and lonely than anything I have known in my life.

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